Knicq

The midnight morning conundrum, where conundrum is a new word I had learnt months ago
knicq posted in Knicqisms on February 15th, 2007

There ought to be rules against staying up this late doing nothing. Its 1:00 a.m. where I am, and I am where I am more often than not at this hour. Its raat ka pichla peher, and there are people going about wishing everyone good morning already. There ought to be rules against that too. First of all, it is not going to be a morning until another few hours; since it is not a morning until one of the three things has happened:

1. The sun has risen, or indicated that it is ready to rise.

2. Its time for the sun to rise.

3. One has had a good night’s sleep.

You see, its hard for me to comprehend the concept of a morning if it does not entail a sunrise. One’s a fool, and might choose to have one’s good night’s sleep at an odd time of the day, and I must therefore attach lesser importance to the condition that makes it binding for a morning to wait until a fool has undertaken a task. One can, however, be left at liberty to assume a morning for oneself once one has had a good night’s sleep; but to make it mandatory for everyone else to consider it a morning since one has had a good night’s sleep is not only utterly irrational and unfair, it also smacks of a deep rooted undemocratic way of life. Everything undemocratic is not irrational or unfair, however, everything undemocratic is liable to invite a carpet bombing campaign from a country far far away; and that folks underlines just how serious a matter we are dealng with here. It is safe to infer already that every person who thinks the morning starts at midnight, and I hope you see the irony of a morning starting at midnight, is inventing weapons of mass destruction in his backyard, and wears shoe-bombs for recreation. You might as well strangle the darned terrorist and claim your reward for bringing down a future insurgent.

Secondly, even if one were to, for a very short period of time, entertain the ridiculous notion of a morning beginning at midnight, one would be hard-pressed for an explanation, were one required to offer one, for calling such an untimely morning good. How can there be anything good about a morning for anyone who is up and about at that late an hour accepting greetings from fools like one? The available data suggests that either he is working that late, and there is a real possibility of one not finding anything good about anything under those circumstances; or, it must be inferred that he is staying up this late doing nothing, and there is little about staying up that late doing nothing that can be classified as good, which is why I maintain that there ought to be rules against staying up that late doing nothing.