June 22nd, 2018

For Sale – GMC Jimmy.0

Looking to invest in a vehicle? I might have just the thing for you …

The model is slightly older than you might be looking for, but then you will agree youth is no substitute for experience. Jimmy boasts of over 15 years of diverse experience, on-road as well as off-road.

It has automatic transmission, but the driver in you can take confort in the fact that all automation stops there. It is a hardcore manual, so much so that sometimes the whole drive becomes manual – no transmission required. An excellent proposition, if you look at the levels of physical inactivity prevalant in our lives these days. I must have shed loads of pounds (sterling as well as non-sterling) since I bought it. I am sure you will find this option difficult to overlook. Just think of the immense savings that will result with the Gym becoming redundant.

It is fitted with 18” alloy rims, and three of the tyres mounted on these rims are the same size too. The fourth tyre is slightly smaller than the other three, and considerably bigger than the spare – sort of balances out, I would say. All four tyres grip the road very well, and seldom has any road surface affected their function. The trick, actually, is to get them to loosen their grip on the road.

With the passage of time comes wisdom, knowledge, and …. sigh, a malady called old age. Many a body part loses it’s youthful agility. Nontheless, fortunately for our Jimmy, it was always blessed with some very compassionate attendents, and thanks to their dedicated nursing all diseases were fought back effectively. For example, the steering shaft had snapped two months ago, and was replaced with a part donated by a philanthropist Jimmy just as it smoked it’s last fumes. The new part is sturdy and may be counted upon to deliver the goods without snapping or bending for ages to come. The belts and belt tensioner were replaced last month, while the transmission was overhauled last week. The dynamo had gone up in fumes yesterday, and our Jimmy has now been fitted with a brand new one. The RHS door handle had become unable to perform its stated function for sometime, but now thanks to some timely medical attention from the local mechanic, and some physiotherapy sessions after that, has regained it’s former glory. The LHS window machine had had a bout of amnesia, and did not really know if it were winding up or down, but a trip to the local Window psychiatrist cured the attack, and the window opens and closes exactly as it should. The experience has left a few emotional scars, and the machine is still shaky, but recovery is comfortable and well on the way.

The paint is original, whatever is left of it. But, then again we should not judge anyone on the basis of color.

The car has only one bad habit – it smokes. Havana Cigars, or anything that gives rise to such cloudy fumes. It has a healthy appetite for fuel though, and drinks loads of water everyday.

For one thing it does have excellent taste in Music, and to cover the vast variety of music genre it subscribes to, it is fitted with a 12 CD changer. In itself it is not such a great singer, having a voice more suited to that of a drill master, but one should not say so in as many words, lest Jimmy’s feelings may be hurt.

If you are interested in meeting Jimmy, I could fix you folks a date.

Not much changes over time!0

Not much changes over time!

Wonder where did that come from? I open my blog, and find myself spurred to blog – and this is the first sentence I end up typing. Out of nowhere. No pretext. No context. Thud!!! It just falls out of the sky… blue… blue sky… Whatever!

What was I thinking about? What was it that I had felt had not changed over time. I rack my brains for a clue, but there is none to be found. Clueless. Makes you wonder doesn’t it? Frued and Co. will probably want to put the blame squarely on the sub-concious. They may be right. But, what exactly is it that my sub-concious is working on? If anything, even my sub-concious would have to be dumb to think not much had changed over time. Life as I knew it has changed… and I do not think I am in love. Not with anyone else at least!

Much has changed over time. Priorities, people, circumstances, thought process, life and outlook on life – everything has changed. The sun, I was going to say, is the same, as is the earth. But, come to think of it, even the sun has changed and so has the earth. The sun has seen one more day on earth… and the earth has been subjected to one more day of human beings! How can they be the same? They are more pitiable today than they were yesterday, more psychologically damaged today than they were yesterday, more frightened of this monster God has inflicted on them than they were yesterday. In a world plagued by human beings, everything does change over time – there is no other way.

Where did that sentence come from then? I am waaay tainted for a sufistic sub-concious. What was I thinking about?

May be, it was just a stray sentence that had become lodged in my brain from a movie or something. I have seen my fair share of stupid movies… any one of them could have floated this thought in a stupid dialogue.

Not much has changed over time …

… what utter stupidity!!!


Haunjoe – also spelled haunjo. It is a new word recently added to my vocabulary. It is beautiful, intriguing, imaginative and one of the most multi-purpose words I know. You can be in a haunjo; going to, on, under, over or behind a haunjo; you could have a haunjo of a time, or time could itself be haunjo; you could have eaten haunjo, or seen one; beaten a haunjo, or caressed one; you could spend money on haunjo, or make money off it; you could write in a haunjo, about a haunjo, or be a haunjo writer; you could have been overtaken by haunjo on the road, or seen one stranded on the road-side; you could actually haunjo a haunjo, or be haunjoed by a haunjo. The possibilities are endless, and to think that the word comes from Talhaese, and its usage has been perfected by Talhah – my adorable three year old. (Masha Allah)

Not that he is short on words these days. He seems to have learnt a new phrase every time we meet, and we meet quite a few times in a day. But, perhaps his expanding vocabulary, however quickly it might be expanding, has not been able to keep pace with the flow of ideas that he needs to articulate. I am delighted that he has fulfilled that void himself. I am delighted that he seems to have inherited the flair for languages I have secretly (albiet unabashedly) fancied myself gifted with. I am glad he is improvizing already – actually, can’t wait to see what his next haunjo will be… well, we should find out in a haunjo!


Curses and Prayers.0

Some days just start great. Today was not one of them.

I got up late, spent extra time in the washroom, and by the time I got to my wardrobe, the clock was already showing the wrong side of half past seven. I almost decided not to go to the office, but it was the last day before that boss of mine resumed duty after his vacations, and I did not want him to be getting ideas. So, I got ready, albiet half heartedly.

Once I was through with my trying-to-look-good business, I grabbed the keys, the jacket, the copies of Baithak (MIT’s newsletter) and rushed off to the car. It was hot and humid, and as I threw all the things in the back seat, I wondered when the weather would become more bearable. And then it came, the second surprise of the day – the car would not start. The ignition just went hisssss … I cursed.

The battery looked alright, and the fuel guage looked as if it had had a tough day at work. So, I ran to the neighbours, who happen to be the in-laws also, and grabbed their car to get me a gallon of petrol. Huffing and puffing, I put the petrol in the car, discarded the gallon carefully, and got busy with the ignition. Hissss …. I cursed.

The old thoughts began to invade yet again. It was the riba at work. Today, of all the days, when the salary is to be transferred, the car decides to claim its monthly share – three days prior to the salary getting credited to my account. I should have stuck with Maersk. Thinking of Maersk reminded me of the folly I had to face every morning now … the new job. The job I did not like one bit, but had to do because leaving it meant the company would put an employment ban on me, and debar me from entering the country. Not an option I could explore… I cursed.

Back to the day with the unenviable start … tried calling office to let them know about the car trouble. No luck there either – was out of credit. So, I trudged to the shop at the corner and purchased a calling card. Sweating profusely by now, as I dialed the numbers I could already hear their sniggering and wise-cracks about the age of my car(s). Ramon answered the phone with the second bell, and laughed at my latest brush with car-trouble. Next, I called Anu Bhai, the Mercedes specialist. He promised to be here in no-time but arrived a good two hours later. I was catching up on lost sleep when I heard him honking outside. Hastily, I splashed some water on my face and ran to answer the door-bell. Anu Bhai tried to jump-start the car, but all he got was the hissss … Then, Anu Bhai’s assistant sat behind the steering wheel, put the gear in N, and started the car as if there were never any trouble at all… I cursed.

The rest of the day passed without an incident until Aziza walked out at the end of that meeting at FC, and refused to take my calls thereafter. I hope it was not me she got cross with. I hope it was not I who gave her that bout of depression – VGA said she was depressed. I did not curse this time…

… I prayed.

August 02.0

August 02. It was Shahnila’s birthday, and I had no idea how to wish her. I wasn’t even sure where she was, and how life was treating her in general.Shahnila, one of the sweetest people you could ever meet. The greatest of listeners, and the most wonderful of friends one could ask for. All she had to do to be a great friend to you was be your friend, and be herself.

I still remember her fondly, she and her weekly new dresses; complete with new make-up to match. I also remember that day in class when we were having these presentations, which were not really much trouble, nor did they carry any real weightage towards the final grade. But, she was all worked up, and sat through the whole of the two presentations preceding hers holding my hand. That was the sort of thing she needed your support in – a teeny weeny test, an immaterial report, an unimportant presentation.

I also remember the day she sat with me at Punjnad’s stairs, and heard the ups and downs in my love-story. By the time I was through telling her how tough the going was increasingly getting, she was the one with the tears in her eyes, and a smile on her lips. That was the kind of support she lent you; felt your frsutration, your pain, and your longing – felt them probably more than you yourself did. As long as she was around, you knew you had some sincere prayers coming your way, and some real support system, should the things that matter most to you take a turn for the worse. You also knew for sure there was one more person who would definitely rejoice in your good fortune.

And then that last meeting with her – at her home, in their drawing room, over a wonderful meal cooked by her loving mother; her mother who looked so much like her grandmother whose portrait adorned the wall. She had broken up with OT, and I had decided to part ways with wifey-to-be. Our reasons were different, but our pain was the same. We had spoken at length that day. We had spoken about how it was important for her to part ways with OT, because he had a different lifestyle. A lifestyle that required a huge effort and sacrifice from her parents and family to adjust to. We also spoke about how important it was that I do not go against my parents, and sacrifice my love for their wishes. She went ahead and stayed away from OT. I did not make the sacrifice.

Today, if she knew about my two wonderful kids, Masha Allah, perhaps she would be one of the happiest people on earth. Happy that I had found happiness with wifey. She would also lament the fact that it had to come at a cost.

If only I knew how she was doing. Last I heard, her troubles had continued even after her decision to separate herself from OT. I have since always prayed that she finds happiness with whomever it is who is lucky enough to have her as his life partner.

And I have wished, and hoped that she will contact one of us one of these days, and share our joys the wonderful way only she does.

Happy Birthday to you Shahnila, whereever you are. And many many happy returns of the day.

May He bless you with all the best in life, and hereafter.

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